Therapist Frank Pittman believes virtually all cheaters deeply regret straying. "Infidelity is the most devastating crisis for a family," said Pittman. "It creates an atmosphere of simmering anger, secrets and dishonesty," he says. Some estimates suggest half of divorces involve infidelity. But Pittman says couples can take preventive steps. Here are some pointers and tips: 1. Stay faithful yourself If you don't want your spouse to stray, don't have an affair, either. Many affairs are sparked by revenge. 2. Don't marry a cheater If your husband strayed from his former wife to be with you, then he could leave you for someone else. 3. Normalize lust It's OK to be attracted to other people; just don't act on it. It's also acceptable to let your spouse know you find a celeb attractive. But don't let your eye wander checking out every hottie that walks by. 4. Don't share your marital woes with co-workers They may be sick of hearing about it and say "If you don't like her, divorce her", just to be done with it. Or it can pull you and another disgruntled spouse closer together. 5. If you're thinking about having an affair, the best thing you can do is telling your spouse. "You can say, 'I have noticed we have not had sex in a year,' " says Pittman. This way they can work on intimacy issues and prevent the affair. 6. Stay off the computer If you are intimately connected to someone online, that's a red flag. Focus more on the intimacy in your relationship at home. |
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